This “Awesome!”-ness deserves a blog post (plus other stuff)

For one month, I would not be having a mother-daughter bonding with my mom through Yahoo! Messenger or any form of New Social Media. Had it been any other month, it would be a torture. But the reason why I am doing so is because mom is right here, within an arm’s reach as I type this blog post. *claps like a seal and screams “yay!”*

AWESOME.

Having my mom abroad made me one of the happiest persons with the presence of new social media. My family witnessed how our way of communication evolved: from landlines, to mobile phones, to e-mail, to online chatting (and a web camera, too!). My mom was actually the one to introduce me to Skype.

Mom added you as a Friend! Deny or Accept?

A lot of parents, not only mine, are starting to embrace the impact of New Social Media. Two years ago I was freaked out when I saw in my Friendster account that my mom added me as a “friend”. Thankfully though, that didn’t work out, as my mom does not have enough time to modify and add more friends into her account. 😉 Lately, I have also been receiving a lot of friend requests from parents (usually mothers) of my friends, particularly the elders of our church.

So What Does This Imply?


A lot of youngsters like me would absolutely love it if we can rant and act freely, without being watched by our parents (or any other person that can inform our parents, for that matter). Because of that, some are not open to the possibility that their moms will “poke” them on Facebook or asked them to become a neighbor on FarmVille. Another instance is that, because we are easily carried by our emotions, especially those called “hate” and “love”, having your parents as a contact on new social media sites could hinder you from expressing your feelings freely, unless you have a very close relationship with your parents. It is one shameful thing to be scolded by your parents in front of your friends, how much more if it is done online for the entire world to see?

Other youngsters can have another take on this though. They see this as an effort that their parents give in order to become “friends” and know what they can do to establish a deeper relationship with their kids, more than the parent-child relationship and just providing their needs (cheesy, yes, but true). Through these new social media sites, parents also want to know what’s what in their kids’ lives and know the people their children consider as their friends.

Now may I ask, how would you react if your parents “poked” you? Leave a comment below to let me know what you think.  🙂

PS. Just as I was about to publish this post, mom asked me to teach her how to use Facebook. Better get ready, privacy settings 😉

PPS. Nothing ever beats face-to-face communication. I can talk to mom and hug her while doing so. 😀

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13 Comments Add yours

  1. I used to say that my parents will never be cool because they don’t own social networking accounts and I highly doubt they know how one works. But then, as complexities in my life become more complicated than ever (haha) and that these stuff are only evident in my social media accounts, I am thankful and hope that their curiosity on social media stay as it is! Uhmmm, kidding.

    I remember reading in Wikinomics that NetGen finds the Internet their new and own territory where they can exert power and dominance. Since our parents are the rulers in our homes, we perceive the Internet to be a ‘place’ where we can be rulers as well thus having the same power our parents have one way or another. Another thing, the Net seems to be ‘impenetrable’ by the baby boomers, a.k.a. our parents, and this leads to a wider generation gap online. No matter how ‘addicted’ our parents would get to the Net, its impact to us as younger generation is still incomparable.

    🙂

  2. Gel says:

    Nice to hear that your mom’s back home! Though I know that the timing is slightly off since you’re on the spotlight in Villar’s class, which means less time for everything else and more for Horkheimer and Marx. Haha.

    The online parent phenomenon is a good thing, for me that is. On a macro scale, it shows that technophobia is running down the drain. On a micro scale, it entails children preparing theirselves to be more transparent and open to their parents.

    The Internet was not invented to serve our generation. It’s for everyone. So I guess we should be less territorial and act more like humans than peeing territorial lions. 🙂

  3. Rhea Lorenzo says:

    “My mom was actually the one to introduce me to Skype.” – wow! My mom wouldn’t even touch the computer if not for our nagging and that of her sisters abroad. I am the one who created her Facebook account and who would check it once in a while in case my aunts or her friends would contact her online. 😀 My dad, however, is a different matter. He is quite open to using Social Media but his eyes and his work would not permit him prolonged use. hehe.. But then, if it’s your mom who introduced you to Skype, it was my dad who did it for me. In fact, he joined Facebook earlier than I did. 😀

    And to answer your question, I don’t mind getting poked by my parents. But then, that’s probably because I don’t think there’s anything I ought to hide from them anyway. 😀

  4. commania says:

    My parents have a disease which I call “tech allergy.” They don’t own cellphones even by now which gives me a hard time contacting them but gives me more freedom as well since they have no means to know where I am going (but don’t worry, I’m a good child. :)). They also have little interest and knowledge about online stuffs. This may be an advantage on my part since my actions online can never be personally detected by my parents. It’s just so natural how NSM provides an avenue for us to express everything that we want to express. It gives us the freedom to create some noise in the online community by saying in our FB that we are in a relationship (but I never did that! Hehe. :D). We have things that we can say to our friends that we do not want our parents to know. Sometimes the closest persons in our lives become the farthest ones by heart. And the sad thing about that is that NSM even add up to stretch more the gap.

  5. I just saw my mother on my suggested friends before reading this, really, and I was thinking of clicking the “add her as a friend” link. But of course I didn’t do it! Haha. Anyway, she has been using Facebook for about 6 months now and I was wondering why she hasn’t sent me a friend request yet given the fact that she’s connected to almost all our relatives in Facebook. Maybe she knows the thoughts of our generation about this issue—we don’t like them to know everything about us. Maybe she doesn’t want me to feel that she’s spying on me and just waiting for my friend request. Well that’s cool. It’s good that she knows where I’m comfortable.

    Thinking about it, we should be thankful for the existence of social networking sites too because we now have another way of rebuilding our relationships. If you are not in good terms with your mother for example, and she’s adding you up on Facebook, it might be her way of saying “Let’s start all over, here on Facebook.” Maybe she’s sending a friend request because she wants to be friends you—not a mother looking for something to nag about.

    This fear of being scolded online, well it can be discussed. Children can tell their parents that “If you want to know what I do outside the house, there has to be some rules—the dos and don’ts online.”

    Well I guess we really have to think about this issue in relation to our relationships with our parents before we react to it. We have to stop thinking that they’re adding us only because they don’t trust us. Yes scolding can still happen from time to time because of your photos online or whatever but the more important thing to think about is this: Will it be make my relationship with my mother better or worse?

  6. *Will it make… sorry. haha

  7. Patsy says:

    Since I have a close relationship with my mom, I don’t fear her being in Facebook. In fact she’s added me. My aunts in abroad are also on Facebook. Sadly though, they don’t go online often. They’re still not used to SNS. I think my mom registered in Facebook only because her friends became reporters of what I posted on my profile. But really, I have nothing to hide. I hope my mom sees my FB profile often so she’ll know how busy I am with school work and how big it makes a dent on my wallet. Then she’ll send me more COLA. If she pokes me on Facebook, I’d probably cry. She may not be abroad I’m far from home. *tears*

  8. blahblahblogsheet says:

    Few days ago, mom told us “turuan nyo nga ako mag Facebook” I was like, “Oh no, I’m not having this conversation.” Maybe because my mom and I are not really close buddies. It’s not that I’m hiding things from her, I’m not just comfortable with the fact that she sees everything I share with my friends. On the other hand, I am quite glad that parents today are slowly overcoming the fear of technology.

  9. juolpindo says:

    My mom’s officially addicted to Facebook. Last week, she asked me to help her create her facebook account. She then asked me to teach her how to use it. Before I left home for manila, she asked me to teach her upload photos on her facebook account. While I was teacher her, she said: “nakakaadik pala talaga ‘tong facebook!” She requested me to add her in my list of friends. But of course, thanks to the workshop on SNS, I have discovered the magic of the privacy settings! hehe! Now I don’t have to worry that my mom would be able to read everything in my account.

    So what does this imply? The new social media has indeed evolved. We can now hide our posts and select a group of people who can view and comment on our status updates. We can now select our target audience, and design and craft our messages for them.

  10. Jet Tumang says:

    Face the fact, everybody’s going social. Yep, that is the future. Anonymity will die, privacy will be redefined, and we will all be connected. Don’t worry, although it isn’t highly noticed right now, but you would certainly need online accounts for your parents when you become independent. With all the stuff going on while you’re already working, I’m sure that face-to-face communication would be as rare as vacations. You’d be relying on social media to keep in touch with your family. ^_^

  11. Marj Casal says:

    You, Mavic and I can’t make now make a book on “How to stop your parents from invading your Facebook network! Hahahaha. I won’t wonder if I will come across another blog post from our classmates that rants about their parents being on Facebook. Well, IT IS BLOGWORTHY! It is nice to know that I’m not the only one who was “added as friend” by my mom…. and aunts…. uncles… and grandma. They’re all over the cyberspace, my gowd! Good thing Ellis taught us last wednesday how we could minimize (or shut out) our family from our network: and this is by using the just-what-I-needed lists! Now, go use it KC! 🙂

  12. niccy says:

    Was I mean to ignore my mom’s friend request? Cause I did.

    It wouldn’t be fun for me to be poked by her, even have that feeling that she can spy on me through my wall posts. It just wouldn’t work for me primarily because my online world is my world without her and her being in it is just… wrong. We’re not close, by the way, so to speak from that perspective.

    On the other, I have another mom which is my friend in Facebook. She’s my host mom from the US. I had all the willingness to open my life to her because we have a closer bond, more like a friendship bond but with a motherly twist so I’m very comfortable with the idea of her having an access to my private world.

    I think that that’s the advantage of having control over social media. It allows you to make relationships grow, at the same time, prevent unnecessary tensions.

  13. chocostraws says:

    I’ll love it if my mom would add me on facebook. She will see my FB stats and finally realize the hardships I have to endure to be able to hand her a decent Transcript of Records…

    On a different perspective, if I am Jollibee, since Jollibee capitalizes on family-bonding, I think I would use this increasing family-connectedness on Facebook for brand campaigns. Since a lot of families are already experiencing this set-up, I think it would be timely. 🙂

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